a thousand years
inside
a thousand years
beyond

empty
these eyes
are full.

I leave
my old eyes behind -

filled with light 

"First Meditations"
by Laurie Conrad

As the darkness melts away, dawn washes over the pond. The water lilies open - graceful and beautiful. The Great Egret seamlessly eases into the water.

The poet Mary Oliver asks, "Where does the temple begin, where does it end?" Is only the temple building sacred or does it extend to the lily pond? How about the sunrise and everyone who comes to pray? What about the Great Egret? Maybe there is no end to the temple, and the reflection is just the beginning of the journey.

As the darkness melts away, dawn washes over the pond. The water lilies open - graceful and beautiful. The Great Egret seamlessly eases into the water.

The poet Mary Oliver asks, "Where does the temple begin, where does it end?" Is only the temple building sacred or does it extend to the lily pond? How about the sunrise and everyone who comes to pray? What about the Great Egret? Maybe there is no end to the temple, and the reflection is just the beginning of the journey.

Years ago Kat and I swam with a hundred wild dolphins on a glorious Thanksgiving morning. I imagine this experience turned us into dolphins. We jump and play, often exploring the depths of the vast ocean.

Kat and I have been walking the labyrinth. Although one can walk the labyrinth with others, it is an individual journey, a meditation walk within.
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Years ago a girlfriend asked me about the qualities I wanted in my partner. I replied that I always imagined he would be like a dolphin. I wanted to meet somebody loving and spiritual, who has a lot of creative energy, is intelligent, and has a warm, honest heart. Some years afterwards, I met him. We will soon be married.

I believe we all have the power to make our deepest desires-- our dreams-- come true. Sometimes I feel that if I just reach out I can touch it, that a dream is not that far away. 

Every night we read stories to our son, Jai. We read about cute barnyard animals, little trains, a pig called Wibbly, the alphabet, and many other children's books. I wonder, as Jai is falling alseep, what he’ll be dreaming about. He's been trying to make "meow" sounds lately... maybe one of our kitty cats will appear in his dream? Or maybe the colorful fish that he loves to feed in our acquarium... (more)

An owl played a significant role in our son’s entrance into this world. I was driving home after an art fair in Lahaina and witnessed an owl fly into the truck in front of me and fall onto the highway. It was after sunset and the highway was busy with fast moving cars. My first thought was, "You’ve got to turn around..." followed by, "What if it’s hurt? What will I do?" Despite the onslaught of opposing thoughts, I turned around.... (more)

Q: What do you want?
A: To have daddy back.
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Java sparrows perch side by side on the banana leaves, waiting for us. When our hobbit house bedroom door opens, they greet us with fluttering wings and happy chirps, “Good morning! Good morning!” As one of our daily rituals, we delight in filling the bird feeder in our garden with wild bird seed. (more)

On a full moon, a little kitten wandered in from the guava forest. He was a black and gray tabby. We already had two cats and were reluctant to adopt another, but he was so irresistibly cute. Plus the alpha cat, Bamboo, let him in... so he stayed. We named him "Mahina" which in Hawaiian means the moon. He is now the one that cradles me everyday.

My fiancé, Vaughn Paul, adores dolphins. He recently asked with a sweet smile, "Will you paint a dolphin painting about us?"

I offer this in gratitude to my beloved partner who deepens and widens my life as we continually create our world together. Thank you for this incredible dance!

My favorite "Cup of Gold" bush grows at the Visual Art Center in Upcountry Maui. Its blossoms are big and yellow and have a very yummy fragrance. It winds along a fence and rock wall, splashing its flowers golden in the sun rays. I went to sketch it one morning, and this was the sweet scene I saw.

In the beginning there was the first holy word - sound. Sound is energy, and energy transforms into form and matter. It is where we come from and where we shall return. It is who we are.

The bowl sings and awakens a beautiful and powerful mystery. It is a quiet, centering energy, the sacred sound of Om. I harmonize and allow the resonance to flow through me, creating me anew.

Hana, on the southeast shore of Maui, is one of the most exquisite places I know. A friend asked me to take a drive out there with him one day. At the time I was extremely busy preparing for an art show, and I didn't feel I could afford a day off. He insisted, and I relented. I ended up having such an inspiring day in Hana that as soon as I got home this painting just poured out of me!

I've always loved reflections on water. Here I was inspired by the temple image on a lily pond.The sacred being reflected.

My son, Jai, says the most amazing things. His clear communication and impeccable timing astound me. Like the way he went up to a Buddha statue and touched its “third eye” then touched his own.
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Jai is fascinated with Buddhas. I became aware of this one day when a friend commented that Jai himself seemed like a little Buddha. Hearing this, Jai looked up at me and touched his forehead, his third eye. "Jai, do you know what a Buddha is?" I asked. He was 17 months old and understood several words in sign language. Jai took my hand and led me down to the lily pond. He reached out to the Buddha statue and touched its third eye. Then with the same hand he touched his own and gazed at me, smiling. He knew the Buddha.  

Soul sisters are such treasures. We know each other the instant our paths cross and our eyes meet. "I’m sure we were friends before we met," R. Gordon writes in the poem Soul Sister, "and that some measure of what I am comes from you." (more)

One day as I was painting, I met an angel. I mentioned to her the title of my upcoming art show, "Where the Temple Begins."

Her wise response, "It begins inside the pain."

I had not considered this possibility. A temple is such a holy place. Does that mean pain is sacred, too?

"Pain, fear, depression are like stones in your stomach. Unpack them one at a time, and you'll transform them," she said.

I want to unearth these hidden treasures inside, and relocate them. After all, rocks belong in the forest.

Tuesday night is drum night in Haiku. Many of the well-known and accomplished Conga drummers from all around Maui come to the property where I live. The drum room is located beyond the banana orchard, just a little ways past my art studio. On these evenings, I often sit outside in my garden with my beautiful white kitty, Sweetie. Bathed by moonlight, together we enjoy these jam sessions.

Jai loves tickling me with blades of grass. He learned this from his grandmother. "Tickle, tickle, tickle," he says laughing, as he swishes the grass around my neck.

One day as we were walking in the garden he stopped at a sapote tree. He reached up with the blades of grass and touched the bark saying, "Tickle, tickle, tickle!" He laughed and went on to the next tree and the next tree, making his way through the garden. The trees chuckled. I don't think they had ever been tickled before.

I started this painting with only 2 dolphins swimming amongst the coral. It never felt finished and at the time I didn’t know what else to add so it lay tucked away in my art studio closet. I recently retrieved it... and immediately knew what it needed; a story that aligned with my current life! I now have a son who "swims" with my husband and myself so I painted in another dolphin. Then I added more color and a turtle and fish. And finally, I put in a treasure chest full of sparkling gold at the floor of the sea. My wish is that we can be like dolphins playing and swimming together in such peace and joy, knowing that life is full of majestic treasures.

I'm beginning to meditate. I am learning to quiet my mind and focus on my breath. Now I'm aware of my breath more throughout the day.

The poet Sri Chinmoy says, "We are nothing in comparison to what we shall become if we pray and meditate for the remainder of our lives."

I want to experience this expansion like the spreading of my internal wings. I want to know a deep resonance of peace as I connect more and more with myself, to my source within.

"Wake up! It's me." Her paws were on my arms, as if to hold me down. She looked directly into my eyes. "What's going on?"

"I don't think I can fly anymore," I said, tears running down my face. "Look, my wings are frayed."

"It's okay. I can help you fix them. Trust me, it will be okay."

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In Buddhism, hand postures or mudras have symbolic meaning. The hand gesture in this painting is called the "earth witness" mudra. The Buddha summoned the earth as a witness to his enlightenment. It is a sign of determination and also represents the transformation of anger into wisdom.

Just as the Buddha awakened to his capacity, I see my own potential and want to live this new expanded vision. My future self summons and beckons me to witness my own transformation.

Many years ago I created a painting called "You Can Kiss Me By Moonlight" about the scent of the night blooming jasmine flowers luring me outside on a gorgeous moonlit evening. My husband knew about this painting... and as we were out on our deck of our bedroom cottage watching the moonrise, he whispered the title into my ears. I laughed in delight... and kiss him. Our baby lay fast asleep inside his crib... and we stood there, wrapped in each other’s arms, soaking in the breathtaking Maui moon.